What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

rocky is here again.......................

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

Do you know why the kid jumped down the 50 foot hole? I dont know, jump in and ask him.

What's funny? Women's rights.

Roses are red Violets are blue My walls are yellow

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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