What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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I have a really funny joke.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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