What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

Chuck Norris.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

Knock knock. Get out!!

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...