A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

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How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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http://adf.ly/C8MqG

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Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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i like turtles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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