What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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What do you call a dead blond in a coset? Last years hide and seek winner.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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