A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...