What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By pulling human entrails out of her purse when he asks her to provide insurance.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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