Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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If your reading this, youre not blind.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops