Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what is white on top and black on bottom Society What is black on top and white on bottom Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops