Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

I don't get it

Steve Jobs is alive.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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