good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

u know whats a crime? rape

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

you will like this because i am black.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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