A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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