A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops