What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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HELLO EVERYONE

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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69

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what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Roses are red Im adopted

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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