Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

Mom, how do you make babies? When a daddy and mommy love each other very much... They play with trains and tunnels!(Yay!)

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...