A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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can you pass the soap?

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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