Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

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Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I`ve got a car behind me. Don`t worry about that you have aids.

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What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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