Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

thumb_up thumb_down +13

hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

thumb_up thumb_down +13

hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops