What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

Whats worse than suicide? death

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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