There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

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Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

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"My, what big teeth you have!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Hood. "Because I'm a wolf," explained the wolf. "And I dress in women's clothing because it makes me happier."

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops