A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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what do you call a man with one leg? whatever his name is.

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Unfortually last night Andrew McNeil was studying soo hard that his head exploded and the next day at school, his friends found out and then cheered with laughter and happieness.

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You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops