why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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What's better then a bad anti joke? A Good anti joke.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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