Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

A Serbian Film

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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