"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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p lkl

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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ert

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies. I'd rather had the porsche in my garage

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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