How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

A black man, a Rabbi, a circus clown, a soldier and the Pope all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

How do you kill a black man There is many ways

What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

Jacob Edwards has friends.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...