What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops