- Anti Joke

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

justin beiber sucks

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops