How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

What's just not right? Left

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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