I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

knock knock who's there? faith

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

rarw

Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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