Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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