What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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* anti-punchline

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops