roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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