What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Im gay What about you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

thumb_up thumb_down -17

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops