What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Sex

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

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Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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