What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is black white green blue and is wet and blind and deaf and homosexual all at the same time? What ever I just described

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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A serial killer walks into a bar... He is finally arrested after killing several people within the bar, goes to court, and it was decided that he is suffering from a rare case of maddening schizophrenia, and sent indefinitely to a mental hospital...

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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There was an elephant , a bird, a man, a tree, a cat, a dog, a lion, a horse, a cow, a pig, a duck, a lemon, a turnip, an apple, a rabbit, a slice of pizza and a spoon. I just wasted around 8 seconds of your life

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops