What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Granny porn!

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

Good job, son.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

Is maynaise an instrument?

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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