A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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Granny porn!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops