Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did rishi say to jess ? GOOD ONE

thumb_up thumb_down +3

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops