A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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