What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops