how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

Why? Why not?

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

An Irishman walked out of a bar

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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