A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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