What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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