Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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