Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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