One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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