A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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Women.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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