Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Turkey Balls

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Q What did the Whale say to the Giraffe? A Why are you in the ocean?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops