Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q:the is a mexican and a black guy in the car who id driving? A:the cop

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock! Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops