Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

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Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops