roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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Yo momma's so fat that when she died of congestive heart failure, your family had to pay extra for a larger coffin to bury her in.

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Your mother just died.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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